|
Saturday, March 22, 2008
my get away.. wish this works.. I have to get away or else the history will repeat itself. I do not want any of those to happen again because I never want to hurt him again. Sometimes I feel confused if I should go back, but I guess no. Yeah maybe I feel like going back but... this is the path that I chose, the path away from him... A path with Linus...
But to tell you the truth.. I am not happy. In fact I still feel empty. He isnt what I need but I am doing my best to stay with him and make it work somehow. Linus is really kind. To endure so much pain for me, he witnessed my foolishness on the act and he is still there for me.. as strong as ever trying to hold on. But I guess it really is me who has problem. I feel sad and I want some time away from him, really far away from him. But that will make him really sad. But I really don't know why despite all the kindness Linus had showed me, I can't stop my fingers from typing the url of his blog (my ex). I'm like a stalker or something T_T. No.. I am not a stalker. Maybe there are still many things left unsaid, yes, there are many things I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him that I am sorry and that I don;t know why I am like this. I wanted him to understand me but he can't. Instead of understanding me, he uttered painful words instead. It hurts. It really hurts to expect things work even if it can never work. exorcism013 wrote his/her thoughts @ Saturday, March 22, 2008
The Writer
I am the torn... and I am despair... caught between dream and reality.. I am your worst nightmare.. every immature minded's mistake and I am unwanted,.. The Saint of the broken... î I need company since I am always in pain... î Do you know what it feels like to be alone? î Do you know the feeling of losing the will to live? î Countless suicide attempts that failed...I have attempted to kill myself even before I was born.. î Don't speak like you know what it feels like to be a ghost î Dive with my on my way down ;_; î Pull me up if you could, I might as well pull you downwards ;_; I am as hopeless as what he bare eyes could see T_T •being alone feels like no one would care to search for your body even if you commit suicide in a dark alley• call me hitori... Soul mates
|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
